New Year (Again)

It feels a lot different this year; the whole holiday, Christmas and New Year season. Everything was just too different from the usual because of CoVID. There weren’t any big parties or vacations, but I was still grateful for the small gatherings that we could have. I’m still telling myself to constantly count my blessings, but it was just very underwhelming and disappointing to me. I guess it’s okay to be sad about missing the way things used to be.

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Hiatus

It’s been a hot minute since I last blogged! I’ve been so busy since I’ve started going back to work and I haven’t had the time and energy to just sit in front of my laptop and type away about my day. It’s just really funny that I went from blogging almost every single day during Circuit Breaker to blogging once every 2 to 3 months.

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First week in my new job has been great! Everyone’s so nice and friendly. So far I’m really enjoying the environment I’m working in and my job scope. I’m finally doing something I actually enjoy!

At the same time, I’m still taking some time to adjust. My body clock has been quite messed up and I thought I’d be able to fix it within a week but it’s currently a new Monday and I still slept at 3.30am last night. My ex colleague said it’s probably because now that I’m working again I’m used to overworking and due to a bad work-life balance I keep expecting that I have tight deadlines to meet and that I still have to pick up calls and reply messages after working hours haha!

No hate to my old job. I appreciate it being my first experience, and I’m glad I could build my portfolio enough to be able to be accepted into this new job. I’m glad that I took a step and moved forward to better things.

I think I’m also having a mild case of imposter syndrome. It’s been so great for me that I feel like I low-key don’t deserve it. I’m paranoid that they might realise later that I’m not really cut out for the job and that I might somehow fail my probation or something. This girl really needs to RELAX.

TLDR life’s been great and I actually can’t wait to get to work later!!

Selfie from my first day of work hehe

my job-searching journey

30th January – I’ve finally started job hunting after a short hiatus from the working-life. I started applying for jobs on the 21st of January, and no one’s been replying probably because it’s almost Chinese New Year. Mom told me not to worry because it’s normal not to get responses around this time.

So far, I’ve only gotten contacted for an interview by one company and it’s the only one that I really wanted, so I’m really hoping that I didn’t mess up the interview this morning. Needless to say, I’m rather nervous, but it helps that so far, I’ve been accepted to every job I’ve ever gotten an interview for.

At the same time, I don’t want to be over-confident. I’ve always been the type to go with the flow and just go with anything life gives me. I’ve never reached for anything that I really wanted because I was so afraid of failing and disappointing myself. I wasn’t even searching when I got my previous job. I was brought in by someone I used to hand out flyers for.

What’s hard about the creative industry is that it’s unpredictable. You could be really good at what you do, but if the person hiring you doesn’t like your “style”, then someone else whose style they do like can easily get the spot.

This is one of the really rare times when I’m actually nervous and I actually can’t stop thinking about it. I keep wondering how many other candidates there are and who I’m competing with. Wondering if I could’ve done the interview better.

I’m even wondering if I would publish this post if I do end up getting rejected for this job. I’m someone who really hates to lose and feels embarrassed about losing, but another part of me loves being transparent and open about my journey (hence the blog). I think it would help me to learn that failing and “losing” is part and parcel of life. It happens to everyone and it shouldn’t be something to be embarrassed about.

I was told that I’d be contacted early next week to know if I’ve been accepted or not and I can’t imagine being this nervous for days on end.

Well… I’ve just been contacted for second interview tomorrow at the same company so I’m hoping this is a good thing. I can’t tell if the interviewer was genuinely interested in me or if she just has a default radio DJ voice.

31st January – So… I got the job! The second interview was conducted by another person and he told me that his partner was actually impressed with me! Kind of went through the same thing, and at the end of it he just told me “I’d like to offer you the job”. I was internally SCREAMING!!!

I went to a cafe close by to calm down and tell everyone the good news! Had granola for brunch.

I’m just happy that I finally got a job because I was starting to doubt myself if leaving the previous job was the right choice. Was kinda afraid that I wouldn’t find another company that would pay me as well because a lot of job offers especially on Indeed were offering as little as 1.7k for my job position.

Anyways, it all worked out in the end and I’m looking forward to this new journey!